At some times, perhaps many times in our life, we all feel that God or some demon is out to get us. I certainly have been thoroughly convinced of this myself very often for many decades.
I have also figured out that anyone who thinks or says; ‘what about me’, in so doing, counteracts any traces of their own spiritual cultivation and happiness.
I believe that no spiritual being is out to get you or me or anyone. I do not think anyone other than our own ego is playing any part in our problems and pain.
Mistakes and bad luck happen all the time and the less awake and present we are, the more they will happen. It is really that simple. You failed in being present and aware and most importantly, objectively accepting what is, rather than demanding what you want it to be.
Our ego is our own personal devil with us 24 hours a day, no days off for sick leave or holidays.
The ego is formed of our opinions and desires. It makes us who we are. So in a way, we are our ego. The question is, is that the sum total and all we are? Or, is there something more.
If you want the pain of feeling the world or God is out to get you and destroy everything you try to do, to end, there is no other way than to accept the objective reality of life and that often things will not go your way. Then go along with them.
Think about how arrogant we can be at times, demanding the weather to change, or the stock market or the government, or even your neighbour or any other human being.
You cannot row a boat upstream a strong and powerful river or into high winds. You have to go with it and flow to safety on the shore. It may not be where you want to end up, but at least you are safe and not sunk and dead.
If there is one thing that we can all work on towards finding peace in our life and maybe lucky enough that it brings a transformation in our Being which gives us better ‘luck’, it is to stop thinking you are special or smart or worthy of anything.
In a word, humble. But that one word encompasses so many things that it is rarely understood as well as being so difficult to practice in this selfish world.
I know it is not going to make me popular to say this but, the truth and evidence is that you are unworthy in the sense that you, none of us really, deserve anything, especially many of the things we want. Even if you work hard, does that mean you really deserve what you want, that is just your opinion coming from your own self desires.
Who says that you, regardless of what you have done and how hard you think you have worked or sacrifices you feel you have made, are worthy. Maybe you still have a way to go to deserve what you want and need to work harder.
When we come to see the reality that our feelings of self-importance, which is any time we feel we deserve anything, are behind our suffering and self-pity, we may have started on the path to humility and true inner peace.
Who knows, maybe if we get far enough we may actually be worthy and deserving of a smile from God.
As for an exercise to help with this, I have big notes to see in a few places that simply say; “I Am Nothing”. And with seeing that, I remind myself that my own ego and feeling that I deserve and want whatever it is, is simply not feasible or reasonable.
Just think about what is involved in your getting what you want, and you will see that it very often means the world has to change in some way just to suit you. Even if it is just one person you want to change, who are you to make another person change the way they are, why shouldn’t it be you who changes? That would also solve the problem.
When you want something from someone, either they give it to you, or you get it for yourself, or you change your desire and no longer want it. Either way, your desire will stop causing you pain. Just think about everything involved and what it requires from another person and that they also have their own desires and life to deal with, and of course their own ego, and then ask yourself, are you more worthy than anyone else in this world?
For all the single mothers and divorcees I know what you are thinking, and here is an answer for you and everyone as well. Some people are nasty and irresponsible and do not take care of their obligations, that is true, but before you get upset with them, think long and hard about the part you played to get into the situation you are in.
You are always a part of everything that effects you, ultimately unless someone put a gun to your head or drugged you and forced you to do whatever it was that got you in this situation, you could have said no or done something about it early on.
Take responsibility for the decisions you made and the life you have to live, accept your part in all problems, and remember that if you got into it, then why should God or anyone else get you out of it. That may help you develop some humility and acceptance in life, and in turn, end a lot of pain and suffering.